Top Reasons I belong in a Nut House

13- I hold long deep detailed conversations with dead people but only in my sleep.

12-Signing all my checks "Mrs. Rock".



11-My time needs better skedualing.



10-I work only to irritate my boss.



9-So I'm compulsive obsessive.



8-So I'm compulsive obsessive.



7-My other personality is named Hermione Erica Granger Kane.



6-My last visit just seamed right.



5-I spent 200. bucks on maple syrup cuz the tree's on the bottle make me feel more green.



4-I 'm into the smell of rubber.



3- I did so write those lyrics for Dr. Demento, damn it. Haa- Haa- Hee-Hee!



2- I am able to inject my own insulin before shock therapy.



1- The three week cold war I held with that foreign service dude that provided my Internet service.

i won the battle i did! my refusal to talk to that non english speaking dingle berry worked. i win!

so what if my hubby was forced to do it, my stubbornness won in the long run

Two Different Things

What I thought:

Oh just shut your mouth. You seen this coming. How long have the experts been telling you to change your habits. You did this to yourself. Act that way and what did you expect? You had plenty of warning. How many hospital visits? You are weak. You had better not try to blame this on me. How many times and ways did I try to help you? You didn't earnestly try a bit, much less listen. I did it, what was stopping you. You have no control. Have this procedure done and it doesn't change you.

What I said:

Stomach bypass surgery can be dangerous.